Wax - Doin Damage

It’s hard to be sober but it’s easy to be bent When you got some extra money and don’t need it for the rent Got a girlfriend now that I secretly resent ’Cause she take up all the time that I previously spent on myself And girls just wanna have fun And she be all fun when her job is done But my job is another thing, 24/7 hustling She wanting to do a couple things, cuddling I like to watch movies, I really fucking do But I can’t stop moving just ’cause I fell in love with you And now I’m just an irritable bastard Like my homie E said a man can’t serve two masters And I’ve got a third one chillin’ in my stomach A little leprechaun screaming “Alcohol, I want it“ And he never ever shut up, he says, “Come on, keep it coming“ And the alcohol goes along with the music and the woman So I black out on the regular And it’s rare I’m a end of the night rememberer Goddamn, I’m a drunken mess Maybe that’s why I’m always fucking depressed I’m doing damage Yeah, I’m doing damage To my body and mind, I’m doing damage Call the doctor, he’ll probably find I’m doing damage My health just ain’t what it used to be ’Cause I done smoked a packed of cigarettes a day since I hit puberty And stupidly, I keep on going and buying ’em And my lungs probably got some cancer growing inside of ’em And it be affecting how I breathe at times I hit playback, hear myself wheeze between the lines I could probably quit if I was thinking clear But my willpower goes out the window soon as I start drinking beer And every freakin’ year I got the same resolutions January second I be making excuses That leprechaun is a dangerous nuisance Who sips champagne while he angrily two steps I got a deal now, it should be essential To straighten up my act and live up to my potential But I just can’t taste that success Maybe that’s why I’m always fucking depressed I’m doing damage Yeah, man, I’m doing damage It’s probably gonna catch up soon, I’m doing damage Call the doctor, I need a checkup soon, I’m doing damage Bridge I didn’t wanna be this way Didn’t wanna get like this every day But my formula’s something that I can’t touch ’Cause regardless I come through in the clutch I come through in the clutch, I come through in the clutch I am too much for you ducks to touch, I am illustrious I am a bad motherfucker and I truly believe that But I gave some shit up to achieve that Like my family and my friends, they don’t call me anymore ’Cause when they would call I would always hit ignore I was always self-absorbed with absorbing myself I drink it up, drink it up, drink it up ’til there’s no more on my shelf And I don’t value my father and my mother enough I don’t value the company of others enough And human interaction is an essential part of happiness I believe And that’s what I’ve been rapping to achieve And I did it in a way ’cause I’m in love with this shit But alcoholism and music something that comes with this shit When you’re living for yourself, it’s a lonely existence And if you talk to yourself, you gon’ be the only one listening And that about sums it up I’m out of gin and I really want another cup So I’m out, to the store I guess ’Cause that’s where I go when I’m fucking depressed I’m doing damage